At a crafting and roman slave eroticismcocktail party with Martha Stewart, the conversation will shift between a condemnation of Lil Yachty's dietary habits (not proper for a businessman) to Fourth of July decor (she recommends painting paper lanterns red, white, and blue).
"What bothers me about Lil Yachty, he might be cute and all that, but he eats pizza and candy. That's all," she told reporters over pink drinks at an event in Manhattan celebrating her new line of paints and brushes with Michaels. It's tough love, though -- Martha also gave a glowing summary of his many talents.
The woman of the hour wore a stylish off-the-shoulder floral blouse to lead craft tutorials, and Stewart didn't get a speck of paint on the top despite opting not to wear an apron. The same cannot be said for this reporter.
SEE ALSO: Martha Stewart, a great content creator, disses Trump's very bad TwitterI ask her if she's familiar with the Millennial Pink phenomenon, and well, I was wrong to ever doubt how hip and with it Stewart is. "Of course! I have a millennial pink bedroom in East Hampton," she says. "My whole bedroom is pink. I have pink linens, pink towels, and my daughter has pink velvet sofas in her house."
So as a millennial woman, do I get any ownership of this specific shade of light (but not toolight) pink that's so aggressively used to sell products to me?
"No! Absolutely not," she declares, laughing, before quickly sliding into entrepreneur mode. "We make pink sheets for Macy's. They are beautiful and they're the right color pink. It's hard to get the right color, but we have the right color."
She's currently very into bright baby blue, so we should probably start preparing for the Parisian Blue takeover.
But young people, do not fear: Stewart still thinks you're cool, and she tells me she's always checking Instagram for inspiration.
"I absolutely love following the big lifestyle trends on social media, and continue to be impressed by how these platforms have influenced design, entertaining, and so much more," she says. Marbling is a hot trend on Pinterest, so she made sure to include a kit in the new Martha Stewart Crafts collection for Michaels. Again, this woman knows how to sell you stuff.
But young people, do not fear: Stewart still thinks you're cool.
Splatter and stripes are also very much her thing right now, so I painted a cotton pouch with light blue stripes and peach splatter hoping to catch her eye. It looks okay, I guess. Martha's better at this stuff.
Her friendship with Snoop Dogg is an actual case study in how to make your way into Stewart's circle, so I'm thrilled when she fills in the reporters on their origin story. It's pretty simple, actually. He was a guest on her show years ago and he made her laugh.
"He's also not afraid to the opposite of what everyone else is doing," she praises. Dammit, was it a mistake to splatter paint my pouch? Martha, I swear I have original ideas!
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